Good morning, afternoon, or evening depending on where you are in the world! My name is Jonny from MoonChimps Media and today I am going to show you how to conquer depression with free Crusades documentaries.
As long as you think in universally and without prejudice, these are just examples of people who are facing hard times or impossible odds – and receiving Divine help. The same way they faced many obstacles, you can use that as motivation for how to conquer depression. Let’s begin.
Step One: Go to Real Crusades History on Youtube. Hit the subscribe button and then go brew some coffee. Alcohol is not recommended (by myself and Big Uncle Vic at least) because alcohol is a addictive, depressant poison for losers.
If you need more convincing than that on the depressive effects of alcohol, check our former boxer Ed Latimore’s path of sobriety. I was also a boxer (although not pro and not even that good at it lolol), so his story is very relatable for me. When I initially quit drinking in November 2017, Ed Latimore stood out in my mind on those boring Friday and Saturday nights as I was dying on the treadmill and going home to chicken and rice with water. You can read his story by clicking here.
Step Two: Set an alarm, because if you have work in the morning you’re probably gonna be up late binge watching these things. There are so many characters and it’s hard to discern their motivations and relationships and all the cities have weird names? I find myself watching the same videos twice or three times in a week just to learn the names of the cities and leaders and of course the years of the events.
Step Three: Try to imagine transferring your postmodern “struggle” into the mind of a Catholic Spaniard whose been ruled by Moors for the past 800 years. That’s not a typo, the Catholic Spaniards were conquered and ruled by Muslim Moors for 800 years IN SPAIN. I would say no one under 30 years old learned about that in school, I know I certainly didn’t and I only know it as a result of late-night Youtube binging. I wonder what kind of advice one of those Catholic Spaniards would write for how to conquer depression.
Step Four: Don’t share a bunch of Crusades videos on facebook, instagram, or twitter. If you’ve made it this far into this article, I know you 1) are sometimes depressed or suicidal 2) Have the free time to be reading this and 3)Might be okay with joining a cult and one of the most important parts of being in a cult is to cut off criticisms from friends and family who will of course try to talk you out of it. So I would actually recommend going into the settings of your social media accounts and pressing temporarily disable as prescribed and proclaimed by Uncle Vic, one of the cult leaders of the cult you are slowly joining.
Step Five: Now that you’ve joined the cult of Victor Pride/Ed Latimore/MoonChimps.com, it’s time to fully immerse yourself in the cult by going to the gym 4-6 days a week. Now, it took me years to realize this, but PROGRAMS MATTER. Spending 8 or 12 weeks following a solid program like Powerbuilding by Mike O’Hearn can make you bigger, leaner, and in better cardio shape than just making your own bullshit program based on the big 3 lifts and other exercises you like. It took me 8 years to realize I am BAD at making my own programs and that for $8.99/month or whatever it is I can just follow someone else’s program and all I have to do is go to the gym and kill it.
Step Six: Go buy (or torrent somehow) the audiobook version of This Naked Mind by Annie Grace. I listen to it while I do cardio and abs. I recommend listening to it entirely at least 2 times before you form any kind of opinion on the book. Just let it flow and brainwash you into sobriety, as billions of dollars of advertising has attempted to brainwash you into drinking since you were a child. If you want to be truly aesthetic, you need to do some kind of cardio, abs, and you need to cut out alcohol.
Step 7: Now that you have no more distractions (social media, alcohol), and that your body is in tune with your mind and on the path to being glorious, you can begin to watch crusades documentaries as motivation for how to conquer depression. Will you start with the Reconquista and Queen Isabella I of Castille? That’s where I started and that’s what got me hooked. You can start watching it right here:
Well, time for me to head to the gym. Hopefully you use my guide IRL for how to conquer depression. Be sure to quit alcohol and check out some of the free Crusades documentaries!